I came across these three questions some time back that are helpful in clarifying whether an employee/employer relationship is healthy. In each case, the question must be answered in the affirmative for this relationship to be considered healthy.

The questions were as follows:

  1. Can I trust you?
  2. Are you [the boss] committed to doing your job with excellence?
  3. Do you care about me [employee] as a person?

They are simple enough questions, and most bosses would think it is easy for the employee to answer with a “yes” concerning them.

Yet, it was found that there was a distinct variance on how the average boss felt these questions should be answered and how most employees would actually answer them.

So why such a large discrepancy?

I have been thinking about these questions a lot the past few days and I have come to the conclusion that they don’t only apply to employer/employee relationships. I believe, they might apply to all of our other relationships as well.

We are in the election season here in the US, and I think these three questions will be the basis for how most people will choose to vote.

As well, our relationships with all public servants, such as the police, hinge on how we might answer these three questions concerning them. At present, the police forces are having a real credibility problem in many cities in the US. For too many people, they have found it difficult to trust the police when they see them breaking the law themselves. Whether it be speeding down the highway with their lights off, or, going through red lights simply because they don’t want to wait like the rest of us; or, it as appears lately, that they are shooting people indiscriminatingly. Many people are now saying they that have lost trust in those who are supposed to be protecting them.

Wherever you are on this issue, if you think about it, I think you might conclude that all of our relationships are built on this simple bed of trust, and when that trust is compromised, then the glue that holds that relationship together, begins to let go.

So can this same thing happen with how we see God?

For many people, their prayers are based off of an understanding of how God “should”, answer their prayers. Meaning that when they pray, they “predetermine” how God is going to answer them. In some cases, this predetermination may interfere with God’s ability to answer as He might wish to….

We are told in scripture that it is only when we pray in faith that our prayers can be answered. Therefore, the difference between how we answer these questions concerning God needs to be fundamentally different than how we might for others. With others, our reservations might be correct, but with God we need to start with an understanding when the outcome is different than we had hoped for, that it is definitely our thinking which was wrong and not His response. Then we need to work backwards to try to understand God’s thinking on the matter.

I encourage you to take some time and answer these three questions about those closest to you – including your relationship with God.

If your honest in your answers, I think it will give you a basis to see what could be wrong with some of the relationships that are most important to you.

… and in your relationship with God, it may unlock the reason that you may feel so many of your prayers remain unanswered.

The Loan Arranger

Author The Loan Arranger

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